The Root Causes of Addiction
By Marilyn Z. El-Abidin
Prologue: No one-person or living entity on this planet, regardless of what esteemed degree they have, or what innate talent or social status they possess, has not dealt with something they need to overcome. I make this statement because as you read this, you may, as I did, when I first began to soul search, would often think to myself, “Who is this person writing this? Are they so perfect making these bold statements?” The answer is that any and all of us, including myself, who have spent their time learning a healing art of some sort has done so because of an emotional wound that they, themselves, have needed to heal. This understanding is what makes for an empathic, compassionate person. Sometimes, even though our challenges hurt, they make us stronger and actually mold us into wiser, more honed, more patient individuals. It’s the final steps up the hill that are the hardest, and in my own opinion, those are the addictions, and their root causes.
What are addictions?
Addictions are the result of suppressing emotions inside the soul (mind/body/spirit). We create other emotions called “desires” to substitute for painful emotional experiences. These desires are cover-ups called “addictions”. Some examples are fears, buried grief, shame, anger or other kinds of emotions. The addictions help us to continue to deny or substitute the emotion that ultimately needs to be addressed and released in order to cure the addiction.
*An addiction is a powerful tool to avoid painful emotions which is why it is a huge struggle to give them up. Those who decide to exert their will and power to confront and face these addictions and causes end up happier in the end because ultimately, you took your power back.
Types of Addictions: (3 main forms)
Addictions can take different forms, for instance, addictions to substances like food, drugs, and alcohol, or other types, such as addiction to pornography, social media games, drama, and, need for constant approval, indecisiveness and self-sabotage.
- Emotional – more difficult to see and have less social judgment attached to them. In fact, we sometimes judge these addictions as loving and nice and they are supported in society most of the time. Because of this, emotional addictions are the most difficult to unravel. Some examples are: putting up a façade of “too nice”, and people pleasing, being manipulative or not being able to make decisions and constantly over-extending yourself for recognition, constant distraction with social media whereas your day completely slips away, or you cannot have a conversation with someone without holding your telephone. These are just a few. The result is often the exact opposite of what the person is looking for. They are looking for approval and recognition and what they get instead, sadly, is lack of respect, scattered thoughts, and abusive/using/manipulative/co-dependent relationships.
- Physical – situations that create temporary physical comfort. This is different than a substance addiction. For example, coming home and immediately turning on the television, watching porn or spending hours on a video or smart phone game and sitting there for the rest of the night. Unwinding is different than not being able to stop.
Society actually promotes and accepts these addictions. Watching TV isn’t terrible and neither are social media and video games. However, if you find that you “don’t have enough time” to do other things you have always wanted to do, like read a book or reach a goal, it could be because one of these subtle, societal addictions are in play. If you don’t have time go outside and spend a few moments breathing the air, and noticing that you are a part of nature, then your addiction is taking this time from you.
Society at large would be healthier, and our citizens would be more well-informed and productive if we were not so side-tracked. It’s all about balance. Are you automatically stressed or angry if Facebook isn’t working or your cell phone is misplaced? Here is an indication. This is, of course, an exercise of your own will. It is your decision whether to let your Light shine or apply the dimmer and give into addiction. How do you know the difference between whether or not you are addicted to these actions or simply enjoying them? Take them away. Do you get angry, slightly annoyed or stressed? Then it is possible there are addiction energies there. It doesn’t mean you cannot do it, but it does mean there is an emotion underneath that needs to emerge.
3 – Substance – “things” that seem to make the underlying emotion temporarily disappear such as alcohol and drugs which cause the self and those around you a progressive breaking down and damage. Or the milder, more socially accepted addictions like coffee, sugar, and over-eating, which are still consequential, but not as severe. An example is a person with grief, anger, denials or regrets may not want to feel that. Instead of processing these feelings and moving forward, the addiction makes a temporary patch, and the process goes over and over and over again creating a vicious circle.
What is underneath that we are trying to cover up? Fears and painful emotions. The strong and most willful, and loving thing to do is to take down the façade, feel the emotion, process it, and release it. Poof! It’s gone! It’s sort of like having the nerve to confront the beast – remember Odysseus? This is the way to heal from the root. Once you process the emotion and use your sincere will to overcome the addiction, you are then freeing a space within you to feel lighter and to brighten your own Light. We all have dark emotions. That is a part of living on this planet. However, when we store them continually year after year, they darken our personalities and this is manifested by “getting a bad vibe” from someone. Or, simply by self-defeating behaviors, such as addictions.
When you follow your addictions, you eventually have a more painful life. Isn’t it better to just deal with the cause and set it free? Come on now, you know you are stronger than the addiction. You know it. Take your power back. It was always yours anyway. Would you let someone into your home to steal all your jewelry? Would you post your bank account on Facebook and say, “take it, it’s free?”. Then why would you give away your own power? It’s the same thing.
What then, is the first step in healing an addiction? You need to be SINCERE. You need to be VERY sincere about wanting to overcome your addiction. If you are sincere, then your will automatically aligns with the desire to heal and overcome.
That is the first step, and frankly, the most important one of all.
Does the hypnotist take control during the session? Absolutely not! On the contrary, hypnosis is a heightened state of awareness. You will be able to hear, think, speak and even feel if you need to use the rest room. The only really difference between hypnosis and meditation is that a hypnotist is trained to notice certain reactions, what they mean, and how to clarify the story your subconscious is telling you.
What will you discover during hypnosis? Once your brain enters the theta-wave state (the state where your subconscious thoughts are most accessible). You may get something called an “ab-reaction”. This is a simple as a tingling feeling somewhere in your body, or a heavy feeling, for instance your shoulders, your belly, your neck or wherever. This is often the energetic/physical location where an emotion is stored. Then, we can go there to explore the emotion and set it free.
When was the emotion formed and when did you start suppressing it? Your sub-conscious has a story and knows exactly what to tell you first. It’s like peeling an onion. The first layer comes off, then the second. It’s like healing a wound. Your body knows what cells to send to the wound and your soul (or your mind if you prefer) knows what story to tell you, even if it doesn’t make sense, or you haven’t thought about it in years, or you think you made it all up.
Will I be forced under hypnosis to tell things I do not want to reveal? No, you are in complete control during hypnosis. However, what you need to remember is that the truth sets us free J. There is no judgement here.
Sometimes, (but not always), there can be another consciousness, or what I call, ” thought blobs” also involved in your addiction, enhancing and feeding off the behavior via an energetic connection to the person facilitated by a resonance to the suppressed emotion. This can often block a session. However, I have learned through experience and training with other professionals, a way to use muscle testing to find and safely release these energetic blockages before the session starts, which has proven to be very helpful.
Preparation for Addiction For Your Appointment
1 – Align your Will with a Sincere Desire to Overcome, once and for all, knowing deep within you that this will ultimately heal the pain of your addiction and improve your life in many ways. In other words, dismantle the façade and Get Real. You have nothing to be embarrassed about.
The fact you are seeking help shows your strength and ability to overcome. Be proud of that.
- Know that this is not about forming a new on-going addiction. For example, “I am addicted to alcohol, so now I am also addicted to getting the approval of my therapist or my hypnotist for every single thing I think and do.” Please, take your power back. That is the ultimate goal.
*While it is true that the support of a professional or a group can help substantially, and being around people who are free from the addiction is very healthy, the ultimate goal is to give the power back to YOU, a viable, thinking, intelligent human. You, and only you, are the person who should decide how many appointments to make, and when you are healed. In the end, you heal yourself. That’s the way it is.
- If you are religious or spiritual person, begin asking and praying for divine support or spend a few moments every day in a silence, preferably in a natural setting outside, just looking around and breathing quietly. Begin with this affirmation,
“I am stronger than my addiction. My will is aligned with my inner strength to overcome. The Light inside of me grows, the truth becomes clear, and I am free”
Or, here is a shortened affirmation, inspired by the book, “Scientific Healing Affirmations” by Paramahansa Yogananda
“The Light is flowing through me and present in all my cells and body parts. I am well”.
Good Luck. You can do it. if you couldn’t you would not be reading this :).